Back in November of 2010, I posted a blog titled, What Being Too Positive Will Get You. It has been a very popular post so I thought I would update it a bit and bring it back for another review.
What Being Too Positive Will Get You
If there is one thing the world could use more it would be more positive people. There are a large number of people I am running into daily who are taking the Be Positive At All Cost thing way too far.
I was reading Chris Brogan’s blog this morning on How to Say No and it reminded me of the hundreds of incidents that have occurred over the past five years I have been involved with where the smiley face ‘Positive Until I Die’ people keep leading people on for months before they find being too positive has now made them look very Negative.
You probably have meet a few of these people, that is, if you are not one of them. You know them as the people who just can not see how saying No, to anything, is being positive. Where do they learn how to be so positive? Is it in their DNA? Or, just a fear of not being popular? I am starting to believe it has to do with social acceptance.
Are blogs like Staying Positive in a Negative World where these people get their thinking then carry it to an absurd extreme? OR, are they going to extremes from looking at the reverse many people have about being Too Negative and pushing the positive envelope beyond the edge of sanity?
There is nothing wrong with being positive about life, work and the world around you. However, refusing to deal with the negative things going on around you because they are not positive will not make them go away. This is exactly what many of the overly positive people of the world are thinking.
Refuse to be the Bad Guy
I find overly positive people’s debating skills to be very entertaining. I also find it very disturbing when positive people try to stay positive and upbeat while discussing business issues that logically are not positive. From the many encounters I have had with overly positive people I have found many of them so stuck on being only positive they will avoid difficult discussions by putting forth a ‘fake polite’ request to excuse themselves. Then just walk away from the conversation since staying would force them into dealing with the realities of life or business. Unfortunately, their avoidance of real life and business issues is what starts tainting the positive image they spend so much energy upholding.
There absolutely is nothing wrong with carrying on an upbeat positive conversation with in a diverse crowd of people you do not know. Actually, it is the preferred conversation style for any type of social or business mixer. However, when it comes time to get REAL a more rational style of conversation, that could have some negative undertones, shows the person’s ability to roll with the punch and deal with controversial issue. This approach allows for negative pressures developed during the discussion to be released avoiding the overload breakdown that results much later.
I also have found overly positive people to be very judgmental of anyone they deem to be negative. Usually, anyone who brings up any discussion of any issue outside the world of positiveness they live in is, to them, a negative person. True, there are some very negative people in the world and I will agree they should be avoided since they will drain you of energy. However, there are a very large number of people who are well balanced in their point of views who are out in the world searching for answers to issues that are keeping the positive side of life and business from shining through. These people are not negative people. To proclaim these people who are able to debate positively a negative issue as being a negative person is really not being very positive..is it?
Ticking Time Bomb
So why do these positive people insist on being only positive and keeping their guard up against dealing with realities? Why are positive people quick to judge someone offering a negative view of something as a negative person. In the few times I have been able to crack the false positive image many of these people have developed I find they have experienced overwhelming negatives during their life and have adopted the ‘positive only’ approach to keep the negatives inside. Over a period of time holding in the realities of their life will usually results in them mentally breaking down.
The world needs more positive people to keep the bright light shining on what is great about life. The world does not need the totally negative people who see nothing good about anything. What the world REALLY needs are people to learn how to balance their personalities so the true person inside can be seen. Being too positive can hurt your image as being totally negative. Learn how to be balanced before you find being positive is working negatively towards your image.
Having a professional image in today’s world means you have to learn how to deal with reality. Let me know how I can help.